Funny SMS

India ka ENGINEERING jugaad


1 bar George W Bush india me Atal bihari vaajpai se milne aaya.
yahaan aakar uski BMW car me kuch problm aa gayi,
jo wo america se saath lekar aaya tha.
Bush preshaan ho gaya.
kaha america se engineer bulao.
Vajpai bola india ke engineer se check karva lete hain.
india ke engineer ne jugaad laga ke car sahi kar di.
Bush khush ho gaya.
Engineer se Bush ne pucha aapne car me kiya lagaya.
engineer bola jugaad.
Bush 4-5 din baad wapas america chala gaya.
wahan jaake car dubara kharab ho gayi.
america ke engineer ko problem samjh nahi aayi.
Bush ne Atal ko phone karke kaha meri car me dubara problem aa gayi hai
mujhe india ka jugaad chahiye jo india ke engineer ne meri car me lagaya tha.
Atal ne kaha pura INDIA jugaad ke dum par chal raha hai,
yadi ye bhi america ko de diya to india me kya rah jaayega.
JUGAADU ENGINEERS ROCKS.


Two Friends Were Talking…

1st: Meri Shaadi Ho Gai.
2nd: Oh! Ye To Acha Hua.
1st: Nahi Bura Hua Wo Bahut buri Hain.
2nd: Oh! Ye To Bura Hua?
1st: Nahi Acha Hua Wo Bahut Ameer Hain.
2nd: Oh! Ye To Acha Hua?
1st: Nahi Bura Hua Wo Mujhe 1 Rupya bhi Nahi Deti.
2nd: Oh! Ye To Bura Hua?
1st: Nahi Acha Hua Usne Mjhe 1 Ghar Khareed K Diya Hain.
2nd: Oh! Ye To Acha Hua?
1st: Nahi Bura Hua Us Ghar Me Aag Lg Gai.
2nd: Oh! Ye To Bura Hua?
1st: Nahi Acha Hua Wo Ghar Hi Mein Thi.


Top 10 Funny SMS

45 saal ka SALMAN KHAN ladki dekhne gaya!
Ladki ki Maa behosh ho gayi!
Hosh aya
waja puchi
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boli- 20 saal pehle ye mujhe bhi dekhne aaya tha.


Ek Aurat Ek Bhikari se
Maine Tumhe Pehle Kahin Toh Dekha Hai…
Bhikari
Kya Memsahib,
Kal Hi To FACEBOOK
pe CHAT Kiya Tha Mere Saath!


Boy: agar mein kahon mujhe tumse mohbhat hai , meri bass yehi chahat hai toh kya karogi??

Girl: mein tumsee kahungii, yeh baat ager tum kuch khila pila kar kahte, ya mobile me balance dalwa kar kahte toh accha lagta…


Ek ladka Pani ko Ghor se dekh rha tha
Itne me 1 machli nikal k boli:
“Tere ghar main Maa, Behn nhi hy kia…”

/(‘,’)/
.) (
/’ /
Dekh yaar ab to bachi chor machi b nai dekh skte


Rishte tor deti hai GF…..
Insaan ko tanha kar deti hai GF…
na aane dena dil ke kareeb kabhi isko…
kyuki dil se dharkan ko juda kar deti hai GF…
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GF bole to galatfahmi ya…….. ..;)
Jo abhi Aap Ko Huyi hai


Ek Ladki Ka Dil Sahi Mayino Me Kab TootTa Hai..???
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Jab Wo Apne Jaise PRINT ka Suit Mohalle Ki Kaam Wali Ko Pehne Dekhti Hai..:


Boy reached home very late at night.
Father (angrily): where were you???
Boy: i was at friends home!
……
Father called his 4 friends,
4 answered:” yes Uncle! he was here with me.”
3 answered:” he just left a little while ago.”
2 answered:” he is still here and we are studying.”
and the last one crossed all limits
he answered,” hello Papa! i will come late tonight.”…


zindgi bhar unki khushi dene ki kasam thi
par us din unki ankhe jheel si num thi
poch dete unke ansu par
kya karu meri hight thodi kamm thi


Judge:
Tmhari Akhri Wish?
Mujrim:
Aap Ki Beti Se Shadi,
Nokia N97,
5 Crore Rupaye,
USA Ka Visa,
2 Saal Ka Haneymoon,
6-7 Bache Jo Aap Ko Nana Nana Kahen
Or Mujhe Papa,
Or Main Un Sab Ki Shadi Karwa Dun,
Uske Baad Aap Jo Fesla kare Mjhe Manzor Honga.
Judge:
Ha Ha Ha…
Meri Koi Beti Hi Nhi..
Tango Saale Ko.


Boy: I love you, you are so beautiful.
Girl: lakin tmhare peeche tau mjhse bhi zyaada beautiful girls kharri hai.
Boy murr k dekhta hai.
Girl: agar tum mjhse sacha pyar karte to murr k kabhi na dekhte, I hate u.
Moral:
Moral woral kuch nahi, bachi zara tez nikli.
Picture abhi baaqi hai mere Dost!!
Boy: hmm tmhari mrzi ye tmhari life hai.
Pata nahi ab me ye diamond ring kis ko dun.
Girl: Lo!!!
ab kya me apne janu se mazak bhi nahi kr skti.


Thirsty crow story in HINGLISH…

Thirsty crow story in HINGLISH

once upon a waqt

there was a kauwa

he was very pyasa

here there bhatka

he saw matka

sum patthar patka

little water gatka

and satka


Kal raat ek Shakhs ne Chand (Moon) se poocha…

Kal raat ek Shakhs ne Chand (Moon) se poocha,
ke mera mahboob kia kar raha hai . . .
toh chand bola:

“Beta dekh,
Pehli baat to yeh ke me tere baap ka nokar nahi hoon
Dosri baat ye ki itni upar se kuch nazar nahi aata
Teesri baat ye k yeh Chichorapan tum log zameen tak hi Rakho”.
yar chanda maamaa ka kal mood kharab tha….


When your life is in the darkness…

When your life is in the darkness,
Pray to God ask him to free u from darkness
And if after you pray and you are still in darkness,
Please pay your ELECTRICITY BILL!


Tution Sir:- abbey gadhey, homework kyon nahi karta hai tu…

Tution Sir:- abbey gadhey, homework kyon nahi karta hai tu?????
New generation student:- tameez se bat kar,
saale customer se ese bat karte hai kya????


Sardar:- Tera result tha ki hoya puttar…

Sardar:- Tera result tha ki hoya puttar????

Pappu:- Miss kehndi hai k is class wich ek hor saal lagega.

Sardar:- koi gal ni, saal pavain 3 lag jawan par FAIL na hoi puttar.


Google maybe the most powerful….


Google maybe the most powerful search engine but,
it can’t search the chappals u lost at the temple.
8)


Students are more genius than teachers….


Students are more genius than teachers….
Because teachers complete their syllabus in 1 yr & student in just 1 day


An old man’s T Shirt Quote…

An old man’s T Shirt Quote
“I am not 60… I am 16 with 44 years of EXPERIENCE”
Think Different, Problems common to all
but Attitude makes Difference.


Teeth said to Tongue…

Teeth said to Tongue “If I just press you little hard, you will get cut.
Tongue replied: “If I misuse one word against someone,

then all the 32 of you will come out at once”


Aadmi nadi me doob raha tha….

Aadmi nadi me doob raha tha,

Bola:- Ganesh ji bachao, Ganesh ji bachao.

Ganesh ji ne suna aur nachne lage.

Aadmi:- aap nach kyon rahe hai??????

Ganesh ji:- mere VISHARJAN me tu bahut nacha tha na.


Ek school me aag lag gayi…

Ek school me aag lag gayi,

Sab bachche khush k ab school nahi aana padega.

Par ek bachcha uddash tha,

Teacher:- Beta why are you sad????

Bachcha:- Sir aap zinda kaise bach gaye.


AaPkO 1 bar hichki aaye to samazna I am remembering…


AaPkO
1 bar hichki aaye to samazna
I am remembering U.

2 bar aaYe to
I wAnT to mEEt U,

3 bAr aaye to
I miSS u

AgAr 4 bar aaYe to
PLEASE pANi pee lena yaar..
TUmahary tabiyat theek NHi hai.


Hamari GAm bhari kahani suniye…. @&*%*mu juTYU…

Hamari GAm bhari kahani suniye….
@&*%*mu juTYU &%$# *^
Y^%#*(*&% UT*
Y*^))( )()*% )(@@ %&)&^% &

AAp ka kasoor nhi .
koi bhi hamare JAjBAT nhi samajh SAkTa.


Phulon se khoobsurat koi nahi. Sagar se gahara koi n…

Phulon se khoobsurat koi nahi.
Sagar se gahara koi nahi.
Aab aapki kya tarif karu…
Dost me aap jaisa…
Nalayak koi nahi!


Jab koi sms nahi karta hai. Itna gussa aata hai.…

Jab koi sms nahi karta hai.
Itna gussa aata hai.

Dil to chata hai,
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Joota utar k,
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chappal pehen lu.


sardar:is mirror ki kia garantee hai shopkeeper: ap …

sardar:is mirror ki kia garantee hai
shopkeeper: ap is ko 100th floor se niche girao yeh mirror 99th floor tak nai toote ga
sardarjf: wow pack it.


Girl : Tum ladke kisi bhi ladki me sabse pehle kya de…

Girl : Tum ladke kisi bhi ladki me sabse pehle kya dekhte ho?
Boy : Ye to depend karta hai ki ladki aa rahi hai ya ja rahi hai!!


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